Renovation

I repainted the door to the basement.  Looks like new!  I went into the kitchen to wash up, and I saw Isaac coming out of the basement.  I had no idea he was even down there.  I was about to say something to him when he practically ran out the door.  He messaged me after and told me that his uncle’s Gall bladder had ruptured, and he had to go see him in the hospital.

I picked up the paint supplies and tried to open the basement door to store them, but it was locked.  Why would Isaac lock the door?  I didn’t want to bother him so I decided to temporarily store the paint in the pantry.  I opened the bottom cabinet and this note fell out.  I have no idea what to make of it.

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Later that night, Isaac came home tired and looked distressed.  Through his anguish, he said he was sorry that he had not been at home as much and that work was really wearing him out.  I hope he feels better soon.

-Stacy

Paint

I’ve been so rattled lately.  I don’t know if Lovelace is picking up on it or what.  She still isn’t eating right.  I put her food down and she ignored it.  I’m pretty sure she may have growled at me.  The weird thing is that she won’t stop scratching the basement door.

scratchdoor

Isaac seems angry about it and wants me to just keep her outside.  For now, I’m taking her for a walk to the hardware store to pick up some paint to repaint the door.  Maybe that will take my mind off of things for a bit.

-Stacy

Who do you trust?

I’m having the recurring nightmares again. Am I crazy? Is my subconscious warning me of something? Did something happen or is something going to happen? The dreams are more and more vivid each time.

In the beginning Isaac… I can hear him talking about turning on the light. I’m in total darkness and can feel myself submerged in liquid. I’ve mentioned all this before but each time I have the dream I try to remain calm. I keep telling myself that if I stay calm I won’t wake up. There’s a blinding light that comes and I see Isaac’s silhouette standing over me. Then the nightmare starts. I feel a snake slither up and down my spine and hear it whisper to me, “Ye shall not surely die. Your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods.” When I look away I see hundreds of dead bodies, their eyes fixated on me, hanging from the ceiling and Isaac smiling down at me.

What does any of this mean? I don’t know what to do when I can’t tell what’s real and what isn’t anymore. Who left the message to trust Isaac? Was it really me? Why? I need answers. WHY?!

Who do you trust, when you can’t even trust yourself?

-Stacy

Research

Thank you for all your information on Vitruvius!  You guys are awesome!  

Enryelle (love that name, very unique!), I have never heard that about the Parthenon.  The last time I went to Centennial Park, I believe I photographed a wedding.

Keith, yes I do find the “Vitruvian Man” a fascinating drawing by Leonardo DaVinci.  It has always piqued my interest in human anatomy.

vitruvian-man

Jason, I had no clue that there was an audio engineering location in Nashville called “Vitruvian Sound”.  That is very interesting.  It led me to google “Vitruvius music” and I found this very interesting article (which does require download to read):

http://www.jamiegriffiths.com/file/omc4i/download

The more I search, the more befuddled I feel.  While all of these things are interesting, I don’t know how they pertain to me.  I accidentally clicked the “home” button and it took me here:

https://cyberanamnesis.wordpress.com/

My husband works for this company, so it did not seem odd that this would be the home page; however, as I was reading company posts, it prompted me for a password.  So, I thought I would try “Vitruvius”.

https://cyberanamnesis.wordpress.com/vitruvius/

But all I got was an access denied page.  Pfft.

-Stacy

Lovelace

I spent much of the day yesterday thinking about “Vitruvius” and what possible significance it could have in my life.   I talked to the therapist and they said that I shouldn’t listen to people on the internet.  Why did you tell me to make this blog then?!  She said that sometimes people that suffer from memory loss can become paranoid and seemed to question the existence of these “clues”.  She asked to see them, and I must admit, I had no physical proof.  Did I just imagine them?  The thought of that scares me to death.  Even though the note had told me to trust Isaac, I want to get to the bottom of this before telling him what I, (ahem) “we”, have discovered.  At least I haven’t been having nightmares.

I seem to remember that I was taking piano lessons at Belmont.  Perhaps that’s why the sheet music told me to go there.  That sounds crazy!  “The sheet music told me to go there.”  I haven’t been able to stop thinking about Lovelace.  She just doesn’t seem to be doing well.  I went through some old photo albums, and I found this picture of us from when she was a baby.  Look at that face!

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Against my better judgment, I am going to continue to research “Vitruvius” and see if maybe it jogs my memory.  Although, I must admit, I’m starting to wonder if I have any memory to jog.

-Stacy

Pathetique

I am extremely disturbed by the note that was left for me at Sevier Park.  It read:

“Stacy, I am writing this so you don’t forget who I am.  I need you to trust Isaac.  He is a good man and only did what he had to do.  Above all, trust yourself.  Go play your favorite Beethoven piece.”

Thank you so much to Jordan and Keith for finding it for me, but I have to ask: Why would someone leave me a note like this?  Why would I not trust Isaac?  I have so many questions, and I feel like I am falling deeper and deeper into this fog that I call my mind.

I spent all day yesterday looking through boxes to find “Sonata in C Minor” since it is my favorite Beethoven piece.  Honestly, I had not remembered that I even played piano until I placed the music on the stand.  As I began to play, I noticed there were markings on some of the pages:

sheet1

sheet2

sheet3

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sheet5

I wish I could figure out what this means…

Alas, I don’t have time to try and figure it out.  Isaac and I are going to dinner tonight to celebrate Ada Lovelace Day.  Some cities even have conferences celebrating her.  It’s important to Isaac, and I feel like maybe it has been important to me too.  Our dog is named after her and all!

-Stacy

Unwell

I haven’t been feeling well today.  My memory seems extra fuzzy, and I’m struggling to put words to my thoughts.  I think my computer might be sick too.  Google maps keeps popping up with the address for Sevier Park.

It’s funny that it would show that address because I used to take Lovelace there all the time.  For some reason, she loved digging around that rock.

sevierrock

She always wanted to climb underneath, but it was much too dirty.  Seems like we haven’t been there in ages.  Anyway…

I think it’s just a virus or cache corruption or something, but it’s making me curious.  I don’t feel well enough to leave the house, though.  I wish someone could check it out and tell me if there’s anything interesting there.  I should hire servants.  I really should.

-Stacy